A Chicken Named Gloria Now Controls Burger King’s Chicken Fries

Burger King is sending a live chicken named Gloria on a nationwide tour to promote Chicken Fries.

This is totally creepy. In a new one-minute video, Burger King introduces their new mascot, a live chicken named Gloria. “Who better than a chicken to decide whether or not Chicken Fries return to the Burger King menu,” a man asks early in the video.

I don’t know about you, but I could come up with a few better ideas than having a creature with no self-awareness deciding whether or not humans are allowed to devour their species. At any rate, Burger King is taking Gloria the chicken on a tour around the nation, stopping at select locations. Once there, Gloria will peck into one of two bowls labeled “yes” and “no.”

The company is inviting “Gloria enthusiasts” – a label which I would assume approximately zero people identify as – to come see Gloria in action, or to watch a live stream as she makes her choice. Who would ever do that?

Why on earth would you travel to a Burger King restaurant to watch a chicken peck a bowl? Why the heck would you watch a live stream online, either? Who is the target market here? Certainly not me.

Here’s another gripe: Why, as the ad claims, did Burger King executives have such a tough time deciding which locations will serve Chicken Fries? The company itself claims that Chicken Fries are wildly popular, so wouldn’t the obvious choice be to sell them at all locations? The logic gap there annoys me.

I’m having none of Gloria the chicken. I haven’t been to Burger King in a decade. I don’t plan on being seen at one — ever.

Howard Davidson Arlington MA


Burger King Subjects Facebook Fans To Ultimate Loyalty Test

Burger King is royally subjecting Facebook fans to the ultimate loyalty test. The tasty fast food giant’s Norway branch recently adopted a radical – and some would say confrontational – strategy in regards to its social media following. In an effort to weed out the negative nancies who have “liked” Burger King’s Facebook page just to post nasty comments, the food chain offered a free Big Mac to each of its fans. The catch? In exchange for the Big Mac, you also have to accept a lifetime ban from Burger King’s Facebook page. This comes on the heels of Burger King rolling out its elusive Big King burger, which bears a striking resemblance to McDonald’s flagship patty.

It’s not often that we see a company actively trying to jettison thousands of Facebook fans, but Burger King thought it was worth the risk of embarrassment. So far, the results have been inconclusive: on one hand, 30,000 of the 38,000 original Burger King fans decided to go for the free Big Mac and banish themselves from BK. That nearly 80% rate of abandonment surely seems like a foolish misstep to some market analysts.

Burger King views it differently, however. While they may have been left with only 8,000 followers, they remain confident that honing their fanbase down to a smaller committed core will promote more positive engagement and interactions on their Facebook page. If nothing else, they’ll certainly get a modest PR boost from purging all the Whopper haters who used to bedevil their page.