I guess it’s true. David Lynch and Christian Louboutin are selling nail polish. David Lynch’s bizarre CGI video attempts to sell Christian Louboutin nail polish. It makes about as much sense as you’d expect. For some reason, Christian Louboutin felt that the best way to market the company’s new $50 nail polish was through a bizarre Lynchian dreamscape. And why not? I’m sure there’s plenty of overlap between the demographics that buy designer nail polish and “Blue Velvet” DVDs. What better way to convince people to spend fifty bucks on nail polish than to show them some “serious art”? After all, women with taste so refined as to require $50 nail polish will certainly be wooed by a bizarrely fetishistic acid-trip video. Don’t just take it from me. Let’s allow Louboutin’s own words to describe why the company’s new nail polish is worth $50:
- “A true objet d’art.” Okay…
- “A tall slender cap, inspired by calligraphy.” What? Why?
- “Delivers in just two coats the effect of 20 layers of traditional lacquer.”
There! Now I get it! This stuff is 10 times better than your average nail polish? Why didn’t they just tell me that to start with, instead of showing me some weird cityscape in crappy CGI? If Rouge Louboutin costs $50, and it’s 10 times better than a $5 bottle, then it’s worth it. That’s just simple mathematics, my friends. No need to complicate things. Regardless of your opinion of Lynch, this video would clearly work better as a dream sequence in “Twin Peaks” than as a means of selling nail polish. Louboutin evidently thinks otherwise, as the bizarre psychedelic theme of the campaign isn’t limited to TV spots. An attempt to purchase the nail polish on Neiman Marcus’ website quickly devolves into a trip down the rabbit hole as well. Of course, there’s always a chance that there’s some high-level subliminal messaging going on here that I’m just not catching. $50 for one bottle…Lynch’s ad is exactly 50 seconds long…nope, I’ve still got nothing. Good luck, Louboutin!